Basic Self-Controls To Interact Effectively With People
And How To Avoid The Biggest Breakdown In Communication
SELF-CONTROL #3: Perception Checking Strategy
Before responding or jumping to the wrong conclusion, practice perception
checking, especially when the outcomes count. Begin to use such
Let me see if I understood you.
So what you are saying is...(fill in what you
What I'm hearing is...(fill in what you understood)
It's important that we understand
each other or our goals.
It's important that we both
understood what we just discussed.Let's make sure that we are both on
the same page.
CHECK to make sure that you have understood and/or are understood by the other
person involved in the interaction. One more thing. when you do use
perception checking be sure to come across as clear, considerate, and sincere
about understanding. Avoid sounding sarcastic or condescending. This
takes practice. To be more successful, return to Self-Control #1.
By taking such control you, then, can slow down the communication process and
turn off the automatic pilot as a communicator. This enables you to
interact purposefully and consciously with others. Take a closer look at
three of the self-control strategies that you may choose to help you be
more competent and effective as a communicator.
Maintaining Your Professional Cool
Decide on the professional image you want to project in your business role. How do you want others to view you?
Professional control is more than controlling your temper or not screaming. Championship professional control means to turn
off the automatic pilot and deliberately come across in the way you want to come across to achieve desirable results - all of the
Assume champion control during those emotionally charged times, i.e., when the unforeseen happens, when you must read
yourself as others read you, when your inner voice says "uh-oh, I better be careful about what I say and how I come across."
Have the "out-of-body communication experience." THINK-ACT without reacting automatically and letting unprofessional feelings get in your way. Think about the goals you want to achieve within
this communication as well as the impact of your voice, body language and actual words. Take the 3-second "Think" break before you
Ask, "What am I really saying when I take away my words?" Read yourself as others read you!
To be in control of your behavior you need to avoid letting the behaviors of others control you. Avoid giving permission to others to
get you flustered, angry, defensive, etc. Take responsibility for your behavior and, therefore, your actions, reactions and your life.
Maintaining professional control in any situation requires your planning goals and desired results and achieving them
as well as slowing down the Communication process. You may not be aware of how you look and sound when you
speak and listen to others, however - everyone else is aware.